Understanding Control Dramas
As we start to understand that “Control Dramas” exist, we can further enhance our awareness of these behaviors displayed by others and ourselves. In this way, we can take the steps to transcend and interpret them on a much deeper level, both spiritually and psychologically.
People seek to control others. It can be seen that there is a distinct reason for this, lurking beneath the surface. Interactive Psychology has been looking into this matter for decades with only moderate success. I contend that another field of inquiry, CONSCIOUSNESS STUDIES, is beginning to explain what is truly going on. Arguments between people in relationships are, in fact, about who will hold the “power.”
A Deeper Understanding
What we have to understand is why people want power over other in the first place. As we gain insight into human conflict, we begin to understand how to resolve more than just our everyday, personal disagreements. We grasp the long-term secrets on how to end conflicts of all kinds — even among large groups of people, such as religious affiliates or even irrational wars between entire nations. When wars are being fought over abstract religious concepts and political ideology exclusively, this understanding becomes crucial.
When I was first exploring all of this research for The Celestine Prophecy, I had a constant and demanding intuition, telling me a deeper understanding was necessary. By obtaining this, not only could I instantly make my individual relationships easier, but it is also the beginning of understanding the reason for humanities eternal use of violence. The fact remains that the issue of “Control Dramas” go all the way back to our deepest, existential fears. In a real sense, the core of what is wrong with humanity is one that is a spiritual matter.
Matter Of Spirituality
At their core, humans primarily feel lost and insecure in the world. This seems obvious, right? We are insecure because each of us has to find our way to survive, individually. We have to make a living, raise and support our children, and in the end, come to grips with death and what may or may not lie beyond it. Naturally, we commit to a particular religion. Although, too often that is just an intellectual choice and does not address the deeper issue: we are insecure because we don’t know for sure what life is about. We find ourselves alive without any certainty as to why. Knowingly or not, this creates a deep anxiety that we must handle.
As we try to control this core anxiety, what is still our greatest tendency? We attempt to repress the fear by pushing it out of our minds with desperate activities of choice, pursued with a kind of unconscious frenzy. We shop when there is no money in the bank. We follow celebrities instead of studying our own lives. We play video games or watch sports obsessively. We partake in all sorts of addictions, diversions, and ideologies, all with a desperate need to fill that void of unknown meaning in our lives.We seek to manage this deep anxiety by seeking power and control over other people. This gives us a false sense of security because each controlling act only temporarily gives us the energy and surety we need.
Here’s How It Works
When you are in conversation with another, especially with a long-term partner, you join minds in a very real way. Such a joining explains why people in relationships can finish each other’s sentences, “think” to telephone each other at exactly the same time, and link up in many other ways, as Consciousness Researchers are discovering.
In his latest book “One Mind,” Dr. Larry Dossey asserts in truth that this joining of minds is possible. We are all part of a larger, one “Divine Mind,” even if we are not fully conscious of it. So we are often unaware of the nagging insecurity we are feeling and the way it is causing us to behave.
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